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Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, sex-dating, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ minefield, like in *The Hurt Locker*. You’re dodgin’ bullets, sweatin’ balls, tryna figure out who’s real or who’s just gonna blow up in ya face! I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ – what’s the deal with these apps, huh? Swipe this, swipe that, like I’m pickin’ prosciutto at the deli. Back in the day, you’d meet a broad at the Bada Bing, buy her a drink, boom, done. Now? It’s all “profile pics” and “DMs” – what the hell’s a DM? Direct whackin’?

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Man, I was mad once, 'cause my site went down, and guess where I was? Down by the riverside near Puente del Sol. I shouted, "C'mon, not now!" I even nearly dropped my coffee. Crazy, huh? And then, I thought, “Here's the thing… even when things go south, this city’s got that magic.” It always lifts ya up, just like that classic Carol moment: "I wish I had a choice of them all."

Guadalupe Street construction nearly done, but bumpy road still ahead for business owners