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But here’s what ticks me off—shady joints givin’ it a bad rap. Makes me mad, y’know? Like, c’mon, don’t ruin a good thing! I’m all for the real deal—slow hands, warm oil, tension just meltin’. “What’s true for you?”—that’s from the movie, hits me every time. What’s true for me? I’d say it’s the happy vibes—nothin’ beats that tingle down your spine.

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I decide to hit up that little bar on Ulica Kralja Tomislava. You know the one with the neon lights? I need a drink after that chaos. I order a beer, and the bartender, bless her soul, gives me a free shot. I’m like, “Is this a reward for surviving the day?” She just winks.

Fig. 1. The forest area (grey) in Slovenia and distribution of the...