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Lemme hit ya with this—back in ‘78, heard this wild story, some underground spa in Philly, dudes payin’ big bucks for “happy endings” with scented oils from frickin’ Egypt! Ain’t that nuts? Little known fact—massage like that started way back, ancient Greeks rubbin’ down athletes, slippin’ in some sexy vibes on the low. History’s freaky, man! Got me hyped—imagine me, Apollo, oiled up, breakin’ tension like I broke Drago!
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Anyway, I’m laughing at this kid when I bump into this old lady. She’s got this wild hair and a shopping bag full of fish. “You’re a cooper, right?” she says. I’m like, “Yeah, how’d you know?” She just points at my hands, covered in wood shavings. “You look like you’ve been working hard.” I mean, I guess I have? But I’m not about to argue with a lady holding fish.
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