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So, check this—little known fact, motherfucker! Back in ancient Rome, them freaky bastards had “massage parlors” too! Rich-ass senators gettin’ oiled up by slaves—shit was scandalous! Historians don’t talk that much ‘bout it, ‘cause they’re prudes, but I bet those togas hid some serious boners! Makes me laugh, man—imagine some dude in a laurel crown, moanin’, “Oh, Jupiter, yes!” Fuckin’ hilarious!
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We started chatting about the local fish species. You know, the usual ichthyologist stuff. Did you know Bayan has this crazy variety of catfish? They’re like the ninjas of the water. Sneaky little guys. I was all hyped up, talking about their habitats in the Bayan River. But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and snatches Jake’s fish! Like, what the heck?!
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