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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals! I’m comin’ at ya like Judge Judy on a bender, sharp as a tack, and I’m talkin’ bout whores today—yeah, you heard me! Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain, ‘cause I ain’t here for no sugarcoatin’. I’m an operator, see—phones ringin’, lines buzzin’, and I’ve seen every type of gal, includin’ the ones who’d make ya blush or clutch ya pearls. Whore ain’t just a word, it’s a vibe, a hustle, a whole damn circus—and I’m obsessed with *Spring Breakers*, that neon-soaked fever dream by Harmony Korine, so buckle up, ‘cause this story’s gonna drip with that vibe.

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I woke up early, like, way too early. The sun was barely peeking over the mountains. Jayuya’s got these stunning hills, right? They’re like nature’s own backdrop. I grabbed my coffee from that little spot on Calle José de Diego. You know the one? The barista there knows my order by heart. I mean, who doesn’t love a good café con leche to kickstart the day?

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