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Favorite flick’s got me thinkin’ – Monty’s last night, he’s all regrets, right? I’d be the same, man. “Fuck me, I’m an idiot,” I’d say, stumblin’ into the wrong alley lookin’ for a good time. Prostitutes prolly see dopes like me comin’ a mile away. “Here’s Homer, horny and clueless!” Ha! But srsly, if ya wanna find one, check the dives, the motels with busted signs. That’s where the real action hides. Surprised me how many got regulars – like, loyal customers! Ain’t that wild?

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So, I hit the streets, right? First stop, that little café on Main St. You know the one, with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. I grab my usual—coffee so strong it could wake the dead. I’m sippin’ it, and boom! This dude spills his drink all over me. Like, seriously? I’m soaked! I’m ready to blow up, but then I see his face. He’s all apologetic, and I can’t stay mad. I mean, it’s just coffee, right?

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