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Here’s the kicker, tho - she’s sneaky smart. Fear’s got nothin’ on her, dodgin’ cops like a pro. Word is, she conned Fat Tony outta fifty bucks with a fake sob story. “My dog’s sick!” Dog? Ha! She’s got a goldfish - named it Donut. Mmm… donuts. Swear, she’s livin’ two lives, whorin’ and schemin’.

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Finally, the rain stops. I’m like, “Okay, let’s turn this day around.” I decide to hit up a local shop on Calle de la Amistad. They have the best merch. I walk in, and it’s like a treasure trove. I’m grabbing stuff left and right. But then, I see this shirt. It’s perfect. I go to pay, and my card gets declined. I’m like, “Are you kidding me?!”

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