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Tips? Be smart, don’t be a dumbass. Cash upfront, no IOUs—prostitutes ain’t your mom. Check reviews if it’s online—yep, they got Yelp for this shit! Weird fact: In the ‘90s, some Russian hookers doubled as spies—KGB vibes, sleepin’ with diplomats for secrets. Wild, right? I’m over here cacklin’—imagine Putin pimpin’ on the side. “I can’t quit you, comrade!”

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So, I rush to get ready. I’m sprinting down Jalan Raya Kebonarun, dodging motorbikes like I’m in some action movie. You know how it is—traffic here is nuts! I swear, if I had a dollar for every time I almost got hit, I’d be rich.