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Quirky shit? I’d sniff ‘em out, Lecter-style. Their fear, their sweat—delish. Exaggeratin’? Maybe. But picture this: bloke stumbles into camp, pants down, screamin’. “She robbed me!” he wails. I cackle—serves ya right, ya muppet. Little-known fact: some guides moonlight as pimps. Dirty secret of the peaks, innit?

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We get to the scene, and it’s chaos again. Two cars smashed up, people everywhere. I’m tryin’ to keep my cool, but it’s hard. I see a woman cryin’, and it hits me. I hate this part of the job.

Death Notice of Phil Mulcahy (née Enright) (Newcastle West, Limerick)