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She’s laughin’, I’m blushin’—face redder than a smacked bum. “Ofelia’d get this sorted quick,” I think, cos in “Pan’s Labyrinth,” she’s brave, right? Me? I’m a flippin’ mess! So I ask, “How’s this work then?” She’s like, “20 quid, love, quick job.” I’m shocked—20 quid?! That’s me weekly jelly bean stash gone! Made me proper cross—greedy, innit? But then she winks, and I’m all flustered, happy again—daft sod, me. Did ya know, right, some prossies in Amsterdam got union rights? Swear down, read it somewhere—blows me mind, that does!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Dimokratias Street. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. I order my usual—double espresso, no sugar. I need that caffeine kick, especially after last night’s Netflix binge. But guess what? They mess up my order! I get a caramel macchiato instead. Ugh! I’m not a 12-year-old girl, people!

The Multiple (Culinary) Personalities of Hohlidaki